Skip to main content

25 August 2008

It has been quite some time now that I am here. And as they say - thoroughly inducted into the system. The picture on the left, at times, seems to be true - me being the little red human being and stuff around here being those dreaded aliens, ready to gobble me up. But then, you learn to evade them. Evasive action to events which could turn disastrous otherwise comes to you so naturally that its almost like you were born to do it. Yes - you learn all this in an MBA.
You learn how to prepare presentations, you learn how not to prepare presentations and yet be prepared for them. You learn how not to prepare presentations and not be prepared for them and still seem prepared for anything that comes your way! You solve case studies so deftly that it would surprise even the ones who were actually involved in the case - were they anywhere near you. And if somehow - you turn out to be like me - you learn how to be perceived as a good student without opening a single book of a single subject when its almost 3 months that you have become an MBA student. Yes again - you learn all this in an MBA.
Problems or difficulties or obstacles or whatever other name you want to give to it no longer irritate you. Everything is handled or settled or negotiated or whatever other name you want to give to it in a stride. All you have to do is for time to pass and problem automatically passes (now you know what people mean by saying - take it in stride or take it with a pinch of salt, etc.)
Other major learning comes with respect to dealing with stupid people and their unparalleled obstinacy of remaining stupid. You respect their unforgiving persistence of being stupid, think that it is their birthright to remain stupid and leave it to that, almost as stupidly.
As for learning, it doesn't stop, does it? Here are more examples to give you some basic ideas:
1. You live in a hostel. Accept it.
2. You learn to wear smelly socks without bothering your nostrils.
3. You accept the fact that clothes won't dry for days.
4. You can eat anything that looks like food. Anything.
5. You either sleep lots, or you don't sleep. (This in no way implies that you study when you don't sleep)
6. Use of words like management, organization, demand, competence, marketing mix, life cycle, debit, credit, reports, presentation, summary, etc. start flowing in your blood because when you have nothing to write - they come to your rescue in terms of word count.
7. You learn to sleep in all sorts of positions (no pun intended) - standing, sitting on chair with support from tummy/fingers/hands/laptop flap on table, sitting on chair with head hanging at back supported by gravity, etc.
8. You learn to ask for what is yours, without any inhibitions.
9. Sleeping at 3 a.m. with bullets firing and bombs dropping around you. (No, I am not in Baghdad, but there is a game called Counter Strike.)
10. These lists are endless and will keep coming up time and again.
Yes once again - you learn all this in an MBA.

Comments

Popular posts from this blog

Saraswati to Laxmi!

 Image Courtesy: http://www.thehindu.com/ Now that MBA is over and I am considered an ounce wiser, being back home means work. There are so many pending things that are just waiting in the attic to be dusted and made to work again. One of them is the mammoth task of physical share transfer and dematerialization. Though stated in one pretty sentence, it takes months of effort and work. And of course, money!  My brother has been painfully going about the motions of this work for a couple of months now and nothing much yet seems to have resulted out of it. We struck a good deal with a certain Saraswati something shares. I asked, "How much would this one fetch us?". He replied, "Enough to recover the money you spent on your MBA degree". I exclaimed, "Really! Waoh! Even after they have been dormant for like 15 years??!". He quipped, in exasperation, "Weren't they supposed to teach you all this in B-School?" I did shut up and let him do this pain...

Death by Chocolate!

"You can't finish it! No ways..." "Really, even with an empty stomach?" "Even with an empty stomach..." "And what exactly is it?" "Chocolate, chocolate and more chocolate" That is how everyone I know who is currently in Bangalore talked about the ever so famous Death by Chocolate. I had to find the famous "The Corner House" and have this delicacy. I did, in Koramangala . Ordered one. Rs. 115. Wasn't it a bit too much for an Ice-cream? As it turned out, it wasn't. As I looked around and gathered all the yummy types of ice creams available on menu - in front of me landed a big plastic cup on a tray. See for yourself above. It was an eclectic mix of 2 huge scoops of vanilla ice cream, lots of brownie crumbs dipped in chocolate which was then again poured over by 4 teaspoons of steaming hot chocolate syrup [directly boiling in front of you on an electric plate]. If that wasn't enough, peanuts sprinkled and cherry ...

Were you sleeping?

How irritating is it to get a phone call when you are in that last hour of your sleep on a Saturday morning? Worse, if it turns out to be your mobile service provider wanting to confirm if you would want to upgrade your 3G plan (which in any case sucks with most providers in India!) Even worse, what if it turns out to be someone important, like your boss? Now you don't want to sound totally sleepy - do you? What would he/she be thinking of you if he were to ask, "Were you sleeping?" at 11 am in the morning? (And, this is judgmental attitude is especially true of older white haired balding bosses!) Well, here are a few tips to sound all alert & morning crispy when actually you would have killed him for ruining your sleep on a Saturday morning. They have worked well for me, hope they would for you too! - Take a deep breath, let the phone ring for a few seconds so that you get a chance to clear your head (hope you did not have much alcohol last night). T...